In the Belly of the Dragon

That's where we are. Deep in the bowels of the University of New Mexico's Cancer Research Center. We're a loooong way from any wall with windows in it, on the first floor of many, and I can feel the pressure of the massive building as it deadens this room. There are six comfy vinyl chairs and one bed placed around the perimeter, each with a slightly comfy upright chair beside it for family members such as myself and Rosalinde. The three of us: Mom, Rosalinde, and I, came to Albuquerque on Sunday, March 1st. Back into Casa Esperanza, the motel-like home for families with cancer. The 2nd of March saw us get Mom's blood work done, then a bit of shopping in the afternoon. On the 3rd, Mom had a (somewhat) minor surgical procedure: having a port put in to her upper right chest wall, with a small tube leading up under her skin to above her clavicle, where another inscision let the surgeon loop in down into her carotid artery and down into her aorta.

A port is a little plastic thingie about the size of a quarter, but as thick as 5 of them. It's surface is just below the skin and allows easy access for a specially shaped needle to be inserted through her skin (yes, it still hurts) to allow the chemo drugs to be placed directly into her blood stream near her heart, with less side effects than inserting them directly in to an IV in her arm. The port can be left in place for a year or so, with monthly flushing.

This session of chemo introduction will last around 6 or 8 hours of slooooowness. Mom's on Ativan and Benadryl and is Out Cold, in LaLa Land. It takes me 30 seconds or so of shaking, hand holding, and calling into her ear to get her to respond, if only slugishly, for her regular stats. A nice way of injecting poison in to your blood stream, if there is such a thing.

Every chair is occupied with a receiver or family support person, there's tubes, bags, and chiming instruments every where, there's a insistent odor of alcohol, vinyl, essence of hospital, and some baseline of an unknown but mildly disgusting eau de fart. And everyone's waiting. It takes a varying amount of time to introduce poison into one's blood stream without killing them, but it's always long.

Enough.

We'll see.

D